Sunday, April 27, 2008 . 12:22 PM

Omg bad weekend.
haha my handphone spoilt. damn sad omg. repair costs 200 bucks so now my dad's pissed.
and my little toe started bleeding after some woman with killer heels stepped on it when the bus jerked :( And i'm getting nowhere with revision.

It's just a feeling i get, that makes me wonder how it turned out like that.
Was in my fault that I just assumed we'd never change. Or did you just move on.
It isn't that I'm not trying to salvage this, i'm trying the only way i know how to. But you don't even care right?
It's no big deal, we never really played a big role in each other's lives, but i just thought, that we didn' t have to cuz we were past that. I know you changed, I know I don't know anything about your life and vice versa, and I know we haven't talked for ages. But I thought some things would always remain the same.
I guess i can't expect people to never move on. But sometimes i want to scream at you for being so selfish, but i can't help it if you don't ever find the need to call me for a chat, or if you don't remember my birthday, or if you see our friendship as a responsibility. like something you just have to do for the sake of it. If it is then what the heck just get out of my life.

I guess it's just another person in my life that i'm not good enough for. I'm so sick and tired of this.

And, no lah, it's not about you, whoever's reading this. cuz whoever i'm talking about would never come to my blog.

Saturday, April 26, 2008 . 12:59 PM

I love my class!
Who knew the boring and stressful midyears period could be so fun x)
Have been staying back in school so very often. Stayed back to study with Jass and Sandy on thurs! Jass left early, but Sandy and I stayed till 9 haha. School afterhours is much better than school in the day x)

And this goes out to Mr.security guard that refused to open the school gates for me and Sandy: Omg you're such an ass.

K anyway, yesterday was emo day no.2 (emo day no.1 was last friday)
most of 408 was just emo-ing about bio results during english cuz we had a free block. Cheerup Jass! Triple T.K.A for midyears!
Anw, emoing over bio with 408 is funnaye.
Well, then i went running with Jass and Ellyn, and Mr.ong's student was running her 2.4, so he asked me to pace her. So yeah i did a good deed. Cool.
Haha then after that Jass and I were talking about like some nonsense HAHA. so we couldnt really do work, we went taka to buy doughnuts instead, and talked more nonsense. talking to Jass is fun.
haha then i spent my night talking on the phone, which beats studying bio. haha and i realized that i talk alot of nonsense, and this is like another week which went by that i think i'm a loser. haha. Anyway, thanks friend, for listening to me rant x)

Wednesday, April 23, 2008 . 1:05 AM

hmm...suddenly felt like blogging cuz i managed to finish my R-formula worksheet without any help x) sense of accomplishment. haha.
I suddenly feel very thoughtful. About stuff. Alot of things running through my mind now, i guess it just kinda feels likes I'm getting nowhere with whatever i do.
Haha if only i could read minds x) Then I'd know the right things to do and the just right thing to say. I'm not trying to be everything to everyone, i just don't like friends to distance. I wish I could capture moments in my life, not just photos. But i guess everyone captures moments, in their memories. I was just thinking about stuff that happened in the past few years, and there're just certain moments, that i never consiously tried to remember, but I can never forget. Some stuff that i remember, are completely mundane, nothing special, but i guess there's just something significant somehow. A feeling worth remembering.

haha and midyears are coming! My studies are in a mess :(
And yesterday was such a longgggg day, so tiring.
Well, at least I had a fun weekend x)
k, i shall be really mugger from now onwards.

Saturday, April 19, 2008 . 10:20 AM

Had quite a horrible week.
And it's one of those weeks that many things happened so Monday seemed like 5 years ago or smth.
So anyway, yesterday was one of those days that everyone was having a bad day.
At school, Jass was really stressed about stuff, cheer up JASSELYN!
And then Xian Ning and weren't in the best of moods either. We stayed back in school to jog on the track, cuz we wanted to try out 2.4, but sec 3s were taking their 2.4, so we had to run on the outer lane. Haha we had so many failed attempts trying to run during recess/lunch/after school for the entire week. Yeah well, then we did math, haha but we didn't actually do much math, cuz we just started bitching about stuff. Rawr, our lives just suck. Geez why are we the ones that get all the crap. I mean seriously, life really really sucks sometimes, and i don't even know why I can joke about it. Well yeah, it's not a joke, but i guess it's quite laughable, chasing after things that are so out of reach.

Then Sandy joined us and we did more maths and some walking around the school. And cuz the guides had their annual assembly/campfire at night, so the school was in a really festive kind of mood, with party decorations and party hats and balloons! And it just seemed like a really nice day to just hang out in school. Xn left at 7, but Sandy and I stayed back in school to hang around and kinda, do math. We ended up leaving after all the guides stuff. Haha I'm glad i hung around at school instead of going home, it would suck cuz i just wasn't in a good mood yesterday. Well, hope everyone's much more cheered up today! Though that's like, unlikely luh. School's cool x) And yeah, this was a long week, and it's only saturday morning.

Okay KohJiaWen owes me photos. Nice nice clarke Quay photos k. And i think Elaine has the OM photos. Haha and JiaWen says she uploaded the photos on facebook and I'm not gonna get them unless i go get a facebook account. And Lifang owes me alot of photos i think, like any photo we've ever taken since the last 3 1/4 years. haha okay who else owes me photos? Mabel probably does.

Sunday, April 6, 2008 . 1:28 PM

I'm sick and tired of being unimportant to you.
(And 'you' refers to many people)
Yeah so I'm not good enough, not someone you'd like.
I'm not good tempered enough, not selfless enough, not tall&pretty enough.
I don't say or do the right things, not fun enough, not smart enough, not nice enough.
I don't even know how I'm supposed to be, and no i can't be myself, cuz if i just be myself, I'd just be a really lousy person.

And I know I don't deserve to say all these cuz I'm not trying hard enough.
But I don't try cuz it'll never work, you don't even have to tell me that.

And because I can't stop ranting now, i'll just continue.
I hate not being able to say anything because I'm so insignificant to you.
I hate being so lousy at everything I do, and I hate being judged for it.

And I hate being so whiny about all the above because they're such small, insignificant things.

Haha and all that come over me after I watched an episode of Gossip Girl. That's so asinine.

脑海中还在旋转
望着你慢慢忘记你
朦胧的时间
我们溜了多远
冰刀划的
圈起了谁改变
如果再重来
会不会稍嫌狼狈
爱是不是不开口才珍贵

再给我两分钟
让我把记忆结成冰
别融化了眼泪
你妆都花了要我怎么记得
记得你叫我忘了吧
记得你叫我忘了吧
你说你会哭
不是因为在乎

最长的电影 - Jay Chou

Saturday, April 5, 2008 . 1:25 AM

Haha blogger's actually not being irritating today, so it must be a good day x)

Anyway, it was sports fest today and Sandy Choo is the coolest cheer captain ever! Haha was glad that Richard won cheer today and super impressed with Sandy!















Sandy, me and Jass!















With Sandy after Richard won cheer!

Well anyway, sports fest was quite a laugh with Jass, cuz like we kept going on and on about like JC and we just kept being insecure about like JC! Haha after sports fest Jass and I realized that we keep hanging out with each other recently, so we decided that we needed to widen our social circle! haha so we called yuhui and Ellyn, but they had a party to attend. haha whatever. But we met Sophia and Jiawen, haha so we successfully widened our social circle on the way back to Toapayoh mrt x)

Hmm oh yeah I was being weird during training in the morning, well yeah whatever. And coach was trying to talk sense into me, but i was just kinda confused. So i called Lifang at night, and like just said whatever went through my brain, haha cuz I don't even know what I'm thinking of. Was kinda hoping lifang would figure it out and like tell me what my issue is, haha but i guess it's kinda impossible considering how incoherent i was x)

k anyway, went out with Vienna and Jass for Riccioti/Rissioti? at Clarke Quay yesterday night. Haha we were so loser, walked from Clarke Quay to Boat Quay and back to Clarke Quay before we found the place. But it was worth it cuz it was half price after 9pm! haha guess what we got for $12.50 manzzz

















Haha and Jass kept laughing at me and Vienna, cuz we were really lousy and getting headaches after abit of Hooch. We went to take photos before we left, well, but the photos weren't very successful, nevertheless i shall post one x)















Vienna, me and Jass!

Haha Jass blogged more about it than i did; backspacedelete.wordpress.com!

Well anyway, had training early in the morning today and I had to wake up at 5.47am. And I managed to catch the school bus at 6am. How pro is that x)

And, here's a random photo from the sleepover that was really fun.


















Oh and since this is such a photo-heavy post, i should just post another one!




















This is Ella and I hugging a potted plant outside the marina square toilets. haha and i'm posting it because it's her birthday soon! but the photo was like ages ago.

Haha anyway, i miss studying with Dawn, hq and jeremy for last year's end of year exams. Was telling Dawn today

Me: Hey studying with yall very effective and very relaxed. I scored really well for the subjects that I studied with yall!
Dawn: really ah, i scored very badly. you guys too distracting.
Me: haha did my stupid chem questions distract you?
Dawn: what questions did you ask? i forgot
Me: ummm i remember asking if ethanol was an element.

Then Dawn gave me THE look and she'll probably reconsider studying with me haha.

Anyway, i keep feeling kinda weird these days, like my brain's all foggy and i'm acting weirdly and saying the stupidest things. Can't seem to focus in anything I do, and I just can't take anything seriously. Haha hope it's just a passing phase x)